[rant] need a reality check ASAP or else I'm going to tear my lecture notes
By - Loose_Anything_174
Embrace being human, those emotions are normal. Pusbing them away does not change anything, they're still there. Learn to accept them and do the things you need to do. They might be distracting, but they're yours.
I always wished puberty never changed my emotions towards girls and women. The emotions are pretty distracting, i wish i would rather not have them and be cold and indifferent. But eh, live with them long enough you just get used to it and accept it
Use your studies as an outlet for your emotions.
Hate a certain classmate, teacher or relative? Take Physics? Create and practice questions featuring them with collisions or fatal electrocution.
How about Economics? Feeling short of time? If time was a good, it would be at the Classical Range and suffer from hyperinflation.
Even easier if you take Literature.
What is worse than being heartbroken? Being heartbroken and getting terrible A Level results while suffering in Tekong.
Bruh, that's really dark.
Aft awhile you would get tired of all these emotions and just dc about it. Then u will be able to just study 24/7 and not care about any feelings :) its me right now. Had enough disappointments from people and so i only focus on me myself and i. Working hard for MYSELF and getting good grades for MYSELF. Wtv happens just try not to care about it and just keep urself occupied by studying
Have a study-life balance. Go out if u want, enjoy and have fun.
It may seems like u are wasting time going outside, but having a study-life balance can help u a long way in terms of better memorization, better mental life...and more.
But of course, don't neglect studying too much too...is a balance for a reason :)
Your story is really heartbreaking. Sorry to hear.
By the way, I was trying to guess your gender. At first I thought you could be male until I read "because I can't be them". It appears you idolize, greatly admire or are very attracted to this new friend of yours, although to me it is just the novelty and excitement of meeting some one. I can imagine that you are feeling very lonely. Ask yourself: are your emotional needs being met at this point of time? If not, have you tried talking to someone you can trust?
Is your new friend prepping for A levels too? If they are, why not give them space to focus on their revision? If they aren't.... well, then you should be the one focusing on revision. I don't think they are going to go away instantly once A levels are done with, so why not keep that as a goal in mind to help motivate you in your revision. You might want to put up a paper calendar on your wall to count down to your exams, and any post exam activities. This will help you look at the big picture. Good luck and all the best!